Dating when you aren't a perfect ten or size ten

As a divorced parent, I have dated some recently. And wow is it hard. Things have really changed. Men are almost obsessed with how a woman's body looks. They don't want to see a natural body. They want to see a body that looks like an eighteen year olds.

It just astounds me how shallow most men have truly become. And what they are looking for.

Take example A: Example A is a divorced mom of 3. She works a lot and puts her kids first. She even makes every attempt to be a good Christian female. She's honest, funny, and affectionate. She is heavy set. Not extremely big, but nowhere little.

Example B: Example B has had 2 kids, but lost custody of both of them. She works, but is constantly switching jobs because she can't hold a job. She has bad teeth and has had to have most of them pulled. But she is slender. 5'4 about 110 pounds.

From what I have seen, heard, and experienced, most men would prefer B. Why? Because B, is extremely slender. It seems like everything falls under that.

I never thought I'd see the day where people were like this, and it's a really disappointing society. You will hear men complaining about a woman because she cheated and left them for another man. Then they will go right out again and fall into a relationship. They fall in love or lust with a woman's looks and don't care about the personality. It's all about the looks. Then they wonder why they are experiencing relationship problems?

Looks are the initial thing. But after that, someone's personality is going to carry it through. It's unbelievable the high expectations a lot of men put on a woman's appearance. They expect the woman to have kids and then have a flat and smooth stomach? Get real. I will say there are some really pretty women that are really great people. This post is not about them. This post is about the others.

As for me, well I've had 2 kids. One was a C-section. I am an average size "bbw". I've been told I'm very attractive, in my opinion, I would just describe myself as the girl next door. I've never going to be a ten, and I really don't care. The important thing is, I am overall happy in my own skin. I've had kids, I don't have a great flat stomach, and my butt is to flat, but it's all ok with me. Because it's my body and my choice. In my life, I have so much going on that how I look is the last consideration. There are so many more important things.

I'm not in any rush to settle down, because I don't want to settle for the wrong person. I thank God for the wisdom he has given me over the years in the matters of the heart. I thank God that I've learned from the things that have happened and not been shallow minded enough to always think it's the other person's fault. I think that is a big mistake a lot of men make. They always blame the woman instead of doing some serious soul searching. They don't take into account that maybe they chose the wrong person based on looks only. And it backfired.

In some ways, I am glad that I will never be the perfect ten. I want to be liked, loved, and respected for who I am on the inside. As time passes, my looks will change. Who I am essentially inside will not. I don't want every tom, dick, and harry hitting on me because of my looks. I want to be friends first with someone and see what can develop from that. God has granted me the wisdom to tell a man's intentions pretty fast, and for this I am truly thankful. Give me an old-fashioned guy anyday. These modern men really aren't worth the clothes they are wearing. And they have no idea what being a man really means.

I am a firm believer that what comes around goes around. For the men that always pass up the girls that don't look like supermodels, one day it will come back around on you. When they break your shallow and immature heart, just remember the ones you passed by because they didn't have the looks you were looking for. And for the women that kill themselves to try to portray themselves as the next Brittney Spears, give yourselves a break. If all it's going to land you is a guy that's crazy about your looks but not who you are inside, it's not even worth it. Live life for God, then yourself. In the end that's what matters anyhow.